Stress

Well, it's been a stressful week!  I've had a lot on my mind and a lot of things going on with loved ones that has been just eating me up inside.  In the past, my response would be to run and get the most comforting food I can find - ice cream, chips, diet coke.  But I can't do that anymore.  So dealing with stress has become harder for me.  I've been too busy to get to the gym this week, although I'm working out all day at work.  But I just haven't been able to find that outlet to release the stress.  And because of that, I've let it manifest in ways that is not me.  A friend even had the guts to tell me about it this week (Thank you BR for your honesty - that's true friendship!)  I find that as I lose more weight, I'm also losing my self-confidence. Isn't that strange?!  I might sound the opposite when I talk about my accomplishments but it might actually be a cover for how low I actually feel and over-compensation.  When I was 100lbs heavier, I never had self worth issues.  I seem to have more now.  I can't figure it out why, but I hope to look into it more and maybe see the social worker at our Bariatirc Center about it.  I hate feeling this way.  I want the old Dayna's mind and heart back with the new healthier body.  Can I have both?  I sure hope so!

It's been a pretty slow week - not much to report on.  So this will be a short post.  I had my 6-month surgery follow-up this past Thursday.  The doctor and dietician were very pleased with my progress.  The dietician said that I'm considered "healed" at this point in regards to my surgery site.  I have to try to start eating more and more variety, but I find that hard still.  I will try though!

I think I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but some of my girlfriends and I have signed up for a half marathon in October.  So training is underway.  I have always hated walking but thought I would enjoy running/jogging more because I get "there" faster! haha  I started the Couch to 5K program and it's a great resource.  Yesterday I had my (almost) 8 year old daughter join me as I went for a walk/run around the neighbourhood   She totally rocked!  And she pushed me to keep going.  Of course, she just kept chatting the whole time we were gone but when I was starting to find the running hard, she just kept encouraging me.  I might have to take her with me on every run!

 This week I lost another 2lbs for a total loss of 122lbs.  I am feeling good physically but not so much mentally.  It's okay though - I'll figure it out and come out on top!  Aside from all of that, life is good and I'm thankful to God for helping me through this journey.  I also thank my family and friends who continue to support me all the way!  Here is my 6-month post-op monthly pictures - I had to change my top because the red one is too big.  I'm hoping to get it altered because it's an awesome summer tank-top! haha

Total Loss: 122lbs